Jake Spruance ’19
*onion-esque article*
HOCKESSIN, DE — November 21, some time in the afternoon, local boy Billy Korowitz fell down a well at his grandmother’s house. “I had been trying to jump between the roof and the stone base, just like the parkour athletes do in the YouTube videos I watch all the time,” said little Billy when we were interviewing him from the top of the well. “I really thought I could make it,” he continued, “because all of those other guys always do it and make it look so cool. I turns out, you know, since I have a bad leg from the last time I tried jumping off of that wall at Rockford, that I couldn’t quite make the jump.” Indeed, this boy with a death wish had previously attempted to execute a “very high” jump off of a wall at Rockford Park, but ended up landing on the camera which was supposed to be recording him. “I guess I don’t have the best hand-eye coordination,” he admitted, “but I still want to be a great parkour athlete. It’s a life skill. You never know when you’ll need to jump off of a wall like that.” Continue reading “Boys Falls Down Well, Turns Out He Wants to Stay There”